Tuesday, February 15, 2011

The Cliffs of Insanity

Who came up with the word "blog"? Maybe it's just me, but it kind of sounds like a communicable disease of some kind. "Oh, watch out for Tom, he's got the blog..." It just seems to be a really strange word. I'm sure if I really cared enough I could research the history of "blog", but I guess that's why I'm starting this blog to begin with; I've ceased to care.
As humans, we try, immensely hard, to care or at least to pretend to care, but in reality, we only truly care about number one, the self. After a while, even that fades. As we grow; we drink, smoke, curse, punch, speed...and eventually run ourselves down. There is no second to stop and take a deep breath, no matter how often we preach to do so, we are simply too busy to give a damn, too rushed by societal impulses and standards--and so I, like those before me, just stop trying to give that damn. 
There is rarely a significant how or why these things happen, it is the wear of the tread, the erosion of the rock..."one of those things". We live, we learn, we cower, we stop trying and suddenly as if our eyes were closed to the entire event, we just don't care anymore. But we should.  
I'm not writing on here because I think my little, vastly-insignificant words will move someone or thrust me forth into some unmentionable fame, I am writing here to attempt this climb that I gave up so long ago. I looked upon these cliffs and surrendered once: I bowed my head and submitted to their greatness. But...I cannot surrender forever. I cannot diminish my potential merely out of some odd societal pressure to withdraw your arms and curtsy politely. 
Maybe there is yet an ember left inside me.

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