Invisible

For someone of my stature, it's amazing how well I play the wallflower. I can blend in, fade to the back, and become completely unnoticed. It's been a gift since childhood. I have known how to stay out of the way and not call attention to myself. Even now, at 25 ::shudder:: I can walk into a room silently, and sit without anyone noting my presence. 

This has been easy, I'm quite shy naturally, I don't like to call attention to myself generally. Some of you might think, what? E? Shy??? No way! alas, it is true. I've learned to compensate for my strong desire to disappear by being loud, abrasive, outlandish. I learned that quiet was an easy target, caustic was not. But, still, an introvert through and through. 

Only recently have I realized that my invisibility cloak, the one I thought I'd left behind early in grade school, is still very much hung about my shoulders. Friends don't know me, they don't see me for who I am. No one does. I've gotten so good at pretending to be something else that who I am almost doesn't exist. 

I can't be angry, I have created this world in which I am only seen as one thing, and all details contrary to that thing are discarded as irrelevant or out-of-character. But it does make me a little sad. I hope that when I grow up, someone sees me. The real me. Someone knows me for who and what I truly am, and I will no longer be invisible.